


Tell the World

by dolphina



Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Coming Out, Future Fic, Injury, M/M, Vancouver Canucks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-17
Updated: 2019-04-17
Packaged: 2020-01-15 08:10:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18494893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dolphina/pseuds/dolphina
Summary: “But it’s not worth the risk of people finding out,” Elias says icily. He knows where this argument is heading, knows he’s the one forcing it, but he doesn’t know how to stop and go back to before Nik started tearing down the future he’d imagined for them.“Right,” Nik nods slowly, like he knows he’s walking into a trap.“So I’m not worth the risk.”





	Tell the World

**Author's Note:**

> This is sad... I don't know why I do this to myself... but I promise there's a happy ending.

Hockey was all that mattered. Winning the Stanley Cup, that was the dream. And they had a chance to do it tonight – it was game 6, and the Canucks were up 3-2 in the series against Boston. It would mean so much to the fans, to the team, to win it on home ice against their nemesis. It was a chance to ease the pain left by the brutal game 7 loss in 2011. That was long before Elias became a Canuck, but it was an integral part of their team’s culture. So this game was _everything_.

At least that’s what Elias was trying to convince himself as he laced up his skates. Across the room, Nik was starting to strap his gear on, just as lost in thought as Elias was. _What was he thinking?_ Elias wondered. He didn’t know, hadn’t known since before the playoffs started. Three years ago, when he arrived in Vancouver, Nik had been his first friend. It had been a struggle, at first, to speak in English, but it helped knowing that it was almost as hard for Nik as it was for him. They understood each other better than anyone else, and during the awful stretches in that first season when Nik didn’t get to play, it was Elias who took the time to practice with him and cheer him up. They had always been close, even before New Year’s Eve in Elias’ second season when he finally worked up the courage to admit to Nik that he was in love with him. They’d been together from then until a couple of months ago, over a year in total. And even now, when they hadn’t spoken since the playoffs started, hockey wasn’t everything. 

Nik was everything. 

***

April 5, 2021

They won in overtime. Elias tied the game with 8 seconds – _8 freakin seconds_ \- left on the clock. The Isles had been coming hard all night, desperate to hold onto their playoff spot. Elias wasn’t sure if they had or not, and it didn’t matter, because the Canucks were first in their division and had been firmly in a playoff spot all season. Overtime could be fun, but was mostly just exhausting and stressful, so tonight Elias wanted it to be over as fast as possible. He was ready for the playoffs. This year, they had a real chance at winning it all. 

Nik scored with a beautiful wrist shot off of Elias’ pass, just 20 seconds into overtime. It was a great way to end what had been by far their most successful season with the team. The crowd was still shouting and clapping as the team left the ice, laughing and chirping and congratulating each other on a game and a season well played. 

When Elias stepped into the locker room, Nik was already across the room, laughing with Jake. He was practically glowing – it was his first overtime winner. Two years ago, he wouldn’t even have been trusted enough to set foot on the ice in overtime, let alone take a shift with Elias. For a moment, Elias imagined crossing the room and kissing Nik, right there in front of their teammates. He shoved the thought aside. Only Brock knew they were together (and Nik didn’t know he knew). It was better that way, especially now, when playoffs were about to begin and a good locker room dynamic was essential. 

They had a great, supportive group, everything a team should be, but that was no guarantee. Some of them might be uncomfortable with gay teammates, or let something slip to the media, or be traded and tell their new team… the potential for disaster was astronomical. And yet, lately Elias had found himself wishing that they knew. What would it be like, to be able to kiss Nik the moment they stepped off the ice, instead of waiting until they got home? To be free from the obvious attempts at setting them up with their teammates‘ wives’ friends and the endless questions about girlfriends or their lack thereof? More and more, Elias wanted to stop hiding. 

He’d mentioned it to Nik once, when they were having a lazy morning on an off day, lounging on their balcony. 

_“Do you ever think about telling the team?” he’d asked as they sipped their lattes._

_Nik choked on his latte. “What?”_

_“Telling the team. About, you know, us. Aren’t you tired of sneaking around and…” he stopped, noticing the look of panic on Nik’s face._

_“NO.” Nik set his mug down so hard it sloshed coffee onto the table._

_“Why? I’m sure it would be fine, it might be a little awkward at first, but they’d be supportive.” When he’d raised the issue with Brock the other day, he’d assured Elias that it wouldn’t be an issue, which made Elias even more convinced than ever that they could and should come out to the team._

_“You can’t know that. We’re not telling them.”_

_Elias sighed. This was not going how he’d planned. He knew Nik would be reluctant, but he hadn’t expected him to vehemently refuse. Perhaps he should have. It had taken nearly a year before Nik had told anyone, and even then, it was only because his sister had guessed._

_“Can we at least discuss it?”_

_“It’s too risky.” The fear in Nik’s eyes persuaded Elias to drop the subject. He didn’t bring it up again. He’d rather have Nik like this, in secret, than not at all. It was enough, until it wasn’t._

***

April 6, 2021

Everything fell apart the next day. 

Sooner or later, Nik was bound to find out that Brock knew. Elias had told him almost right away, because Brock was his best friend and would’ve figured it out on his own. They made it over a year without Nik realizing that Brock knew, but then Brock caught them together the day after the regular season ended.

Nik was over at Elias’ place, ostensibly to play video games. The controllers were quickly abandoned in favour of making out on the couch. Nik was straddling Elias’ lap and kissing his neck when they heard the door open. He flung himself away from Elias like he’d been burned, but the couch was in clear view of the door so Brock had already seen. Even if he hadn’t, it was pretty obvious from their flushed faces and shirts discarded on the floor. 

“Oh shit, I didn’t realize you were home. Did not need to see that,” Brock apologized. 

“I – We weren’t – it’s not – “ Nik stuttered, trying in vain to come up with a plausible explanation other than the truth.

Brock looked at Elias, silently asking what he should say. He knew that Elias wasn’t supposed to have told him and didn’t want to cause trouble.

“Nik. It’s ok, he already knows,” Elias said, threading his fingers through Nik’s in an attempt to calm him down. Nik ripped his hand away angrily. 

“You TOLD him?! You promised not to tell any teammates!” Elias had already told Brock when he’d made that promise, but he knew saying that would only make things worse.

“I, uh, just came to get my hoodie,” Brock said awkwardly. He picked it up from the back of a chair where he’d left it the previous evening. “I’ll just… go.” He started towards the door but paused with a hand on the doorknob. “Nik, don’t be mad at him for this. I’m not blind, I would’ve figured it out on my own.” It’s not as helpful as Brock meant for it to be. 

“Brock is my best friend, of course I told him. I love you, and I want people to know that,” Elias explains as soon as Brock is gone.

“Who else have you told behind my back?” Nik’s voice is cold and he keeps his distance from Elias. 

“No one, Nik, I know you’re afraid of how people would react, I wouldn’t say anything without asking you…” Elias pleads. 

“How can I trust you? I _specifically_ asked you not to tell any of our teammates, including Brock.”

“They’re our team. Do you really think they’d take it that badly? If we walked into practice tomorrow and told them, what do you think would happen?” It’s clearly the wrong thing to say. 

“We’re not telling anyone! Ever! Do you even hear yourself? All it takes is one person who’s not ok with us or one slip in front of the media and the whole world finds out. Is that what you want? Can you imagine what it would be like on the ice? What people would say? I would never be able to go to Russia! My parents would disown me!” Elias recoils. Nik almost never yells. They’ve never fought about anything serious before. 

_‘We’re not telling anyone, ever_ ’ echoes over and over in Elias’ head.

“I don’t want the rest of the league or the fans and media to know. I want to be able to tell my friends. I want to be able to hold my boyfriend’s hand on road trips and at team events,” Elias says in a voice that doesn’t betray his internal panic. He always thought someday they would tell people, at least their teammates and close friends.

“You can’t. We can’t.” Nik shakes his head frantically. “This,” he gestures around the apartment, “is the only place we’re safe while we play in the NHL. You never know how people are going to react. What if we tell the team, and then someone gets traded and mentions it to their new team? Pretty soon the whole league would know.” 

Elias is silent for a moment. “It’s a risk, I’m not saying it isn’t, but I think it’s worth it. I want us to be together, really be together.” 

“We are together.”

“Are we? People in serious relationships introduce their boyfriend to their family and friends. Where is this going if we can only be together in secret?” 

“We know each other’s friends and family,” Nik argues stubbornly, but he knows it isn’t what Elias meant.

“We can’t ever get married if you won’t tell anyone. Weddings require guests.” 

“Is it even legal for us to get married here? We don’t need to be married to be together.” Nik’s dismissal of the idea is like a knife to Elias’ heart. Clearly, he was wrong to think that Nik was as serious about their relationship as he was. 

“I want to get married, and have kids someday,” Elias says softly. “Don’t you want that?”

It takes Nik too long to answer. “I do, but…” 

“But it’s not worth the risk of people finding out,” Elias says icily. He knows where this argument is heading, knows he’s the one forcing it, but he doesn’t know how to stop and go back to before Nik started tearing down the future he’d imagined for them. 

“Right,” Nik nods slowly, like he knows he’s walking into a trap.

“So I’m not worth the risk.” Elias knows there are tears streaming down his cheeks, but he doesn’t feel anything. He’s numb, detached from the situation like it’s happening to someone else. 

“That’s not what I meant. I love you, but – “ 

Elias interrupts. “But not enough.” He pulls his shirt on and stands up. 

“That’s not what I meant. Elias. Elias!” Elias slides his shoes on and grabs his jacket. His expression is glacial and closed off, but there are still tear tracks running down his cheeks.

“We’re done. Clearly, we want different things. Get the fuck out of my apartment.” Elias slams the door behind him, rattling the dishes in the kitchen and leaving Nik in stunned silence.

Elias… Elias broke up with him. 

***

Nik walks home. He rips his bedroom apart and tosses all of Elias’ clothes into a box that he sends flying down the hallway with a violent kick. He sits on the couch and stares blankly at the wall for half an hour. He calls Elias twice and gets voicemail both times. 

Then he texts Jake and Hutty. 

_Nik: I’m going to get really fucking drunk. You in?_

_Jake: Damn, what’s gotten into you?_

_Ben: Hell yeah_!

They meet at a bar downtown, which probably isn’t the smartest move, since there are definitely people who recognize them. There’s no game tomorrow, only practice, so it’s not the end of the world if a few fans see them drinking. Nik does shots until Jake and Hutty, who are several rounds behind him, exchange concerned glances and tell him to take a break. Then he dances, losing himself in the music for who knows how long. It distracts him, putting off the misery he’ll feel when he wakes up hungover and without Elias tomorrow. He gets another drink, and dances with a pretty brunette whose name might be Meg. At some point, he loses track of Jake and Hutty. He and Meg make out on the dancefloor and Nik finds himself agreeing to go home with her. She’s pretty, and fun, and he just wants to forget. 

Nik throws up in the alley, and Meg calls him a taxi. He goes home alone and trips over the box of Elias’ stuff before passing out on his couch. 

The next morning, he has a headache so bad he can hardly open his eyes, a bunch of texts from Jake and Hutty wondering what happened to him, and a missed call from Elias. There’s no voicemail. He called around midnight, when Nik was at the bar. Nik drinks a Gatorade and takes a Tylenol. He decides to go to the rink early in hopes of catching Elias before practice. Elias called him, so maybe there’s hope. 

Elias is in the dressing room, but a PR representative shows up before Nik has a chance to talk to him. 

“Have you seen the photos from last night?” she asks Nik. He doesn’t know what she’s talking about. Last night is kind of a blur and he hasn’t been on Twitter yet. He shakes his head. Elias has stopped tying his skates and is clearly listening. PR lady, Nik doesn’t think he’s met her before, pulls up a couple photos on her phone. 

_Shit shit shit._

It’s him and the girl from the bar. Meg? He vaguely remembers kissing her at some point, and the photo proves that it definitely happened. He’s clearly recognizable. Out of the corner of his eye he can see Elias pulling out his phone to find the photos. 

“They’re all over Twitter. Don’t answer any questions about it,” she advises him with a disapproving look. “You weren’t doing anything wrong.” _If only that were true._ She leaves, and Nik tries to catch Elias’ eye. He can tell the moment Elias sees the photo from the hurt look that flashes across his face. Then the unreadable stone wall is back. 

“Congratulations, no one thinks you’re gay. That’s what you wanted, isn’t it?” Elias hisses. _It’s not_ , Nik almost says. _I want you_ , he thinks. But he’s paralyzed with horror at what he’s done and waits too long to speak. 

“Elias!” Nik calls after him as he storms out of the dressing room, one skate not properly tied. 

Elias pauses in the doorway. “Don’t ever talk to me again.” Then he’s gone, and Nik knows he’s lost him for good. If he’d been at home last night and answered Elias’ call, maybe they would’ve worked things out. But he went out drinking and got pictures of him and some girl plastered all over the Internet. 

Nik knows Elias better than anyone else does. He knows Elias won’t forgive him for this, and he understands. He’s never going to forgive himself either. He took the best thing that had ever happened to him and threw it away because he was too afraid to tell anyone. Because he’s still terrified of people finding out. Even knowing what it cost him, he can’t imagine exposing a secret that could end his career and cost him his family and country.

After that day, they don’t speak. Elias won’t even look at him, so after a couple of days Nik gives up. He knows there’s nothing he can say that will undo what he did at the bar that night. It doesn’t take long for the team to notice the tension and silence between them. After the first disastrous playoff game where Elias can hardly bring himself to speak to Nik on the ice, Nik is switched to the second line with Bo. When their friends ask, and many of them do, Nik just says they had a fight. He shrugs as if it’s nothing, when really it’s everything. The lie isn’t convincing, but no one pushes. 

Brock hates him too, Nik realizes when he gives him the box of Elias’ stuff. And as their teammates see Elias and Brock ostracizing Nik, some of them start to pull away too. It’s the first time since Nik has been with the Canucks that he’s felt like they don’t all have his back. 

Somehow, they keep winning despite the tension and awkward silences. Elias is unbelievable. It’s like every time he touches the puck it goes into the net. Elias is channelling his anger into his hockey, and it shows. Nik tries to do the same, but with less success. He does pick up a respectable number of points en route to the Stanley Cup Final though. Despite all the issues off the ice, they’re up 3-2 in the series against Boston. Articles are already being written about getting revenge and redemption for 2011. They’re so, so close. 

Game 6 is a dirty game. The whole series was vicious, with a couple of players on each team already downed by injury. Nik hates it - hates being nailed into the boards at every opportunity, and hates watching them go after Elias when there’s nothing he can do about it.

The Canucks go into the third period down 2-1. They can’t generate anything, even a shot on goal, for the first 5 minutes. Then their coach takes a risk and puts Nik back with Elias and Brock. Their first shift together, Nik buries a beautiful wrist shot to tie the game. Two minutes later, Elias sets him up for an easy tap in. For the first time in months, Elias talks to him on the bench. Only about plays, and he clearly hates every second of it, but Elias will do anything if it’s the difference between winning and losing. 

There’s 5 minutes left in the game and they’re still up 3-2 when Nik takes a hit from behind. An elbow makes contact with his head and pops his helmet off. He goes flying into the net and hits his head on the crossbar. Everything goes black.

***

Elias sees it happen as if in slow motion. Nik dances around one of the Bruins’ defenceman, (a giant of a guy who’s been after him all game) and passes the puck to Brock. The defenceman ignores the play and takes a few strides towards Nik. His elbow makes contact with Nik’s head, knocking his helmet off and sending him headfirst into the net. Nik’s head bounces off the crossbar with a sickening thump and the goalie lands on top of him. 

Elias can’t breathe, can’t move. The referees blow their whistles and call for a trainer. The goalie gets up, but Nik doesn’t move. Elias glides over to join the huddle of players around him. The Bruins wisely keep their distance. The trainer has called for more help and is talking to Nik, who doesn’t respond. He’s unconscious with blood seeping into the ice from a gash on his head. Elias kneels beside him, careful to keep out of the medical staff’s way. He feels detached from the scene on the ice, as if he’s watching it play out from the rafters of Rogers Arena. 

Elias discards his gloves and stick to hold Nik’s hand, gliding along beside the stretcher as they take him off the ice. 

“I love you,” he whispers over and over, not caring who hears. He can’t focus on anything except Nik. Nik, who looks so fragile when he’s injured and unconscious. Nik, who broke his heart but still owns every shattered fragment of it.

When Elias gets back to the bench, Brock hands him a towel. He looks at it blankly. 

“You’re crying,” Brock says. Elias takes it and wipes away the tears he hadn’t noticed. “Are you ok to play?” 

No. No, he isn’t. He can hardly think, can hardly breathe, let alone play. But this is the Stanley Cup Final. It doesn’t get any bigger than this. If they can last the next five minutes, the Cup is theirs, so he nods and takes a sip of water. He can do this. They have to win for Nik. 

After a lengthy discussion while the ice is cleaned up and the net restored to its position, the refs call a two minute interference penalty. Bo yells at them the whole way back to the bench, and then their coach yells some more, but the call stands. With five minutes to go, Boston won’t have a chance if they call a major. The fans are on their feet, screaming and booing the refs. 

Elias goes out with the first power play unit, determined to make it count. Bo wins the face-off and sends the puck back to Hughes, who sets Elias up for his one-timer. He launches the hardest shot of his career and finds the back of the net to make it 4-2 with 4:45 to go. 

On his next shift, Elias spots number 11, the defenceman who injured Nik. His gloves are off before he’s had time to make the decision, the play abandoned as he throws himself at the Bruin. He has the element of surprise on his side and manages to land a couple of punches before the other man has his gloves off. He’s not a fighter and never will be, but he holds his own better than anyone would’ve expected, fuelled by rage and adrenaline. Still, it doesn’t take long before he’s down on the ice and the linesmen are pulling the Bruin off of him. 

“Too bad you couldn’t stand up for your boyfriend before he got hurt,” one of the other Bruins taunts. Jake crosschecks him so hard he flies several feet before faceplanting on the ice. He jumps to his feet, ready to fight Jake, but they’re pulled apart before it can go any further. 

Elias is vaguely aware that his face is a mess and his hand feels like it might be broken. There’s only about 4 minutes left, so Bo convinces the referees to let them sit in the penalty box to watch the game rather than go to the dressing room. Jake joins him for a cross-checking minor, which puts Boston on a powerplay for 2 minutes. 

“So…” Jake starts once they’re in the penalty box and play has resumed. Elias knows what he’s going to ask. Elias has never fought anyone, has only taken a couple of roughing penalties in his career. His teammates, and likely the media, will want to know why it was different when Nik was the one lying on the ice. 

“Not here.” Jake nods and doesn’t say anything more. They watch their PK unit clear the puck, killing time. They have a two goal lead, they just need to hang on a few more minutes. 

Now that Elias isn’t playing, there’s nothing to distract him. He wishes he’d left his helmet on to hide the tears. He hides his face in his hands, but his body shakes with sobs that won’t go unnoticed. 

“He’ll be ok. It’s almost over; we can take the Cup to him after the game.” Jake puts a comforting arm around his shoulders. After a minute, they’ve killed off the penalty and Jake has to go. 

The clock is down to 1:45 and Boston is desperate. Elias forces himself to watch the game, although he can hardly see it through his tears. They won’t stop, no matter how many deep breaths he takes and how many times he tells himself that Nik is going to be fine. Boston pulls their goalie and passes the puck like it’s on a string, but the clock ticks down with the score still 4-2. With 30 seconds to go, Stecher sends the puck down the ice into the empty net, sealing their victory. There’s one more faceoff at center ice and a few seconds of pointlessly passing the puck around, and the Cup is theirs. 

It’s surreal. The crowd is on their feet, screaming and cheering and hugging each other. Elias steps onto the ice to join his teammates where they’re huddled around Demko. He doesn’t want to celebrate, he wants to get off the ice and out of his gear as fast as possible. He wants an update on Nik, he wants to see him. He wants to hold him and tell him it doesn’t matter what happened with the girl in the bar and it doesn’t matter if they never tell anyone about their relationship. 

The postgame celebration seems to take an eternity. First they have to shake hands with the Bruins. Elias’ control is hanging by a thread when he shakes number 11’s hand. Thankfully the defenceman says nothing. Their Captain offers an apology and wishes for a speedy recovery, but the words are meaningless to Elias.

The Conn Smythe is brought out first. Elias wishes Bettman would shut up and give them the Cup, but he graciously accepts the award. Any other night he would be ecstatic. Then they finally bring out the Stanley Cup. It isn’t until he’s watching Bo skate around the ice with the Cup that it really hits Elias: _they won the fucking Stanley Cup_. Then Bo is passing it to him, and he forgets about his injured hand until he has the Cup and it feels like his right hand is on fire. His gasp of pain does not go unnoticed, and as soon as he’s handed the cup off to Brock the medical staff comes to talk to him. 

They tell him Nik woke up in the ambulance but they haven’t received another update since. Then they insist on looking at his hand and deem it ‘probably broken’. They want him to get an X-ray as soon as possible, which is fine so long as he gets to see Nik first. 

“You can go,” Bo says, resting a hand on Elias’ shoulder. “Get your hand looked at and see Nik. Keep me updated and I’ll see what I can do about bringing the team and the Cup to him.” Elias nods gratefully and races off the ice. 

***

Nik wakes up in an ambulance. The paramedics ask him questions – what is his name, what day is it - and thankfully he can answer them all. He remembers the hit and nothing after that. 

“Did we win?” he asks every nurse and doctor he sees. They send him for an X-ray of his arm and a CT scan to make sure the fuzziness he feels is only a concussion. No one knows the final score – they’re all busy working and most don’t care about hockey. Finally he convinces the X-ray technician to look it up, although she clearly knows nothing about hockey.

“Vancouver won 5-2,” she tells him with a smile. “I take it you’re a fan?” 

“You could say that,” he grins. _We won we won we won_! They won the Stanley Cup. The room is spinning and his arm is in agony (broken, the doctor confirms with nothing more than a cursory glance at the X-ray), but it’s worth it because they WON. He hopes Elias got the Conn Smythe – he deserved it. 

Elias. The loss hits Nik all over again. He’d forgotten, for a few minutes, that Elias can’t even look at him anymore. He would give anything to have Elias here with him, just to sit with him and hold his hand. Which he couldn’t have done even when they were together, because people might see. The argument seems so stupid now. 

The doctors do a CT scan and confirm that he’s not going to turn into a vegetable, it’s “just a concussion”, as if concussions haven’t ended players’ careers. They give him a painkiller for his arm that makes him feel like he’s floating and take him to his own room. He planned to persuade a nurse to find out more about the game, but doesn’t have the presence of mind by the time he gets a chance. He dozes for a bit until a nurse wakes him up to do concussion protocol again. 

“Your friends are here. I’m not supposed to let that many people in here, but I can give them a few minutes if you’re up for it,” she offers kindly. 

“Thank you,” Nik says. Did Elias come? If the team came, surely he would be here. Nik needs to talk to him. He has to try. He can’t undo the night at the bar that sealed their fate but he can take back what he said when they broke up. He can tell Elias that he’s worth any risk because he’s the love of his life and _of course he wants to get married and invite all their friends to the wedding someday_. How could he ever have said otherwise? Nik realizes he would do anything to get Elias back. 

Bo comes in first, holding the Stanley Cup. He brings it over for Nik to touch with his good arm. 

“The final score was 5-2,” Brock says. It’s the first time he’s spoken to Nik since Game 1 of the first round. The rest of their teammates file in behind him and crowd around the bed. Nik scans the group, looking for Elias. He doesn’t see him, and Brock must see the disappointment on his face, because he says “He’s coming. He’s downstairs getting a cast for his hand.” 

“What happened to his hand?” Nik asks, alarmed. Brock and Jake exchange a look. 

“He jumped the guy who hit you. He got a few good punches in, managed to hold his own for a minute. I didn’t see that coming,” Jake chuckled. Nik’s mind was reeling. Elias fought someone because of _him?_ He would’ve been shocked even if they were still together. 

“He had the sense to wait until after our powerplay too. Fucking refs only called 2 minutes for interference, but it took Petey all of 15 seconds to unleash his one-timer. The fight was on his next shift after that,” Bo explained. “Stech got an empty-netter.” 

“Wish I could’ve seen it. First thing I’m doing when I’m allowed to look at screens again.” 

A couple more guys chime in with details from the game, but Nik is only thinking about Elias and what he wants to say to him. It’s hard to find the words with his teammates talking and the hammering inside his skull. 

“Whatever happened with you and Petey, it’s time to make up. After you went down, he was… fuck, I wish I could just show you the video,” Jake says softly. “He cried, when we were in the penalty box after the fight. The media is going to have a field day, between that and him holding your hand when you were on the stretcher.” Jake’s voice drops to a whisper and he leans in to Nik’s ear. “I was the only one close enough to hear him saying over and over that he loves you.” Hope flares in Nik’s chest. Maybe, he thinks. _Maybe I can fix this._

“Hey, what are you two whispering about?” Ben asks. 

“Mind your own business,” Jake tells him. Ben looks ready to argue, but everyone is distracted as Elias appears in the doorway with a cast on his right hand. His face is cut, probably from his visor and bruises are starting to show. The sight of him takes Nik’s breath away. 

Their teammates shuffle out of the way so Elias has a clear path to the bed, but he only takes a few steps into the room before stopping, eyes fixed on Nik. Nik holds his gaze for a long moment, unsure where to start. His concussion-addled brain can’t find the words to tell Elias that he’s worth it. He’s worth the risk of telling their teammates, he’s worth the risk of them becoming known as the first gay players in the NHL, he’s worth losing his home country over. Nik should’ve known it all along but he let himself be consumed by the fear. 

“Come here,” he pleads. Elias obliges, and Bo moves the cup so he can sit on the edge of the bed. Everyone’s attention is fixed on them. Their teammates are probably wondering what the hell is going on, and for once Nik couldn’t care less. 

“I’m not mad anymore,” Elias says. He moves his not-broken hand as if to take Nik’s but stops himself just in time. Nik can tell he’s censoring his words, making sure he doesn’t say anything that would give them away. 

It’s tricky with only one arm, but Nik manages to push himself fully upright and pull Elias towards him. He can feel Elias’ shock when he kisses him, but Elias holds him close and kisses him back. Their teammates lose it, whistling and clapping and shouting about bets some of them apparently had riding on their relationship. 

The nurse comes back, clearly unimpressed with the noise level. It’s not making Nik’s head feel any better either, so he’s a little relieved when she evicts most of the team. She takes one look at Elias, his not broken hand intertwined with Nik’s, and decides he can stay. 

“I’ll be back to wake you up again in a few hours,” she warns. “Until then, get some sleep and for heaven’s sake _be quiet._ ” 

“I love you,” Nik says once they’re alone. “And I’m so, so sorry I made you feel like I didn’t. Of course you’re worth the risk of people finding out. I want to get married someday and actually have friends we can invite to the wedding.” 

Elias smiles. “I love you.” He kisses Nik again, slow and sweet. Nik ruins the moment by yawning the second Elias pulls away. 

“You should sleep.” Nik moves over so there’s room for Elias in the bed. Well, sort of. Two hockey players in a hospital bed is not a great fit. 

As he’s drifting off to sleep, Nik thinks of something. “I didn’t sleep with her,” he says. 

“Hmm?” Elias mumbles drowsily.

“The girl at the bar. I threw up in the alley and she called me a taxi.” 

“Sexy,” Elias teases, but Nik can tell it matters to him. 

“Did you win the Conn Smythe?” 

“Duh.” Nik elbows him. Of course he did. “Go to sleep,” Elias whispers in his ear. 

Nik sleeps soundly, knowing he and Elias are going to be alright.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked it! Kudos and comments always appreciated. :)


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